So much better than never have I ever...

[revolvings]

The buzz was settling in smooth along Max's skin, and he was feeling absolutely no pain right now. It was enough that he and Michael were in this texting discussion, but the topic was absolutely insane. Having walked the short distance over to where Michael was staying currently, Max knocked on the door after the last text came back. He felt terrible for giving his brother such a warped view of him. At least he came bearing gifts. A bottle of tequila and a couple of shot glasses, along with a bag of already cut limes. All Michael had to do was supply the salt.

"Wow. I’m flattered. You really know how to make a man feel special.

Who said I wasn’t drinking? I just wasn’t planning on drinking drinking but fuck it. You’re right we’ve been at odds pushing against each other for too long. We’re idiots. I was just so fucked up back then.

You got your dick pierced?! And both your…Ok I take it back. I’m vanilla. You out freak me. I’m scared to find out what else I don’t know.

You go. I’m processing."

Comments

[cosmiccowboy]

I’m working on the trusting good feelings thing. It’s hard after more than 20 years of being conditioned to expect the opposite. And I know how we push each other’s buttons. But you’ve been the only person, the only one who hasn’t run away no matter what I do or how hard I try to push you away. You’re my constant, Max. I don’t want to fuck this up. I can’t lose you.

I’ll bring some stuff the next time I come over. Waking up to you in the morning sounds amazing. But won’t people get suspicious? Like Izzy?

I can’t stop thinking about it either. I want you to feel what it’s like to be taken completely, to be claimed and feel it through this connection. I want to replace those memories of that fucking place. Show you how good it can be.

[revolvings]

I know babe. That's why I'm fine with going slow. I'm not pushing you. Like I said. You get a drawer, and some space in the bathroom. I imagine you'll be at my place most the time, but that's fine. I don't want to wake without you. I can't lose you either, not now, not ever.

Izzy's going to figure it out through our bond. Our feelings are bound to leak eventually. She's gonna shove us in some mindscape and figure it out. When we are ready, we might as well tell her. Not right away, but sooner than later. I don't want her jumping in our brains. You know how she gets.

You are the only one I trust to do that. I wouldn't let another person touch me like that again, not ever. Now though, I trust you, only you. I want you that way. I wish it was the first time all over again, but i think it will be close enough. With you it all feels new again, like I never even knew how sex was supposed to feel. fuck.

[cosmiccowboy]

That sounds doable to me.

Yeah, you’re right. She’s gonna lose it either way. I just want to keep you to myself for a little longer.

I promise I’ll take good care of you. I thought I knew what sex was, what it meant to be intimate with someone. Until you. Now no one else gets to touch you. Ever. Only me. I’m

[revolvings]

We will figure it out with her. She knows that we aren't related, and she's gotta understand where we are coming from and be happy for us. She's got Kyle. We found each other. She can yell for a while, but she does love us.

I know you'll take the best care of me. I'll always take care of you too, Michael. Always. No one will ever touch me again. I swear it, and you know how loyal I am. You better look only ever at me now. Me alone. I don't care if Alex comes back. I know how you two are, but... Michael... I can't compete against him. I need you.

[cosmiccowboy]

Yeah. You’re right. Again. You’re so annoying.

What do you mean you can’t compete with Alex? Who says it’s a competition? I don’t know when, or if Alex is coming back. And yeah, it messes me up every single time he leaves. I don’t think I’m good for him. I mess it up every time. I’m too damaged or something or maybe I was meant for something, someone else. And Max I’m only looking at you, only you. How can I look at anyone else?

Besides, you’re the one with a longer list of exes and I certainly can’t compete with any of them.

[revolvings]

Michael, there's no competition between you and anyone else I ever dated. You outweigh them all. You are the only person I see, and the only one I'll ever see.

I don't know, I guess because you two almost got married. It's scary. It's not easy to be with a guy who knew the guy he was gonna marry for so long. Yeah, I guess it could be the same with Liz and I. She was so not the one for me though and I knew it for a long time. I'm too stubborn though.

I have 2 ex's. I slept around like you did.

[cosmiccowboy]

I get it. Alex and I have a lot of history. Good and bad. I thought we were soulmates. I know go ahead and laugh. But you’re not the only stubborn one. And there’s no one I have more history with than you. You’re my past, my present, and my future. I hope.

Damn. I guess I just assumed that because you’re such a catch and people are usually falling in love with you left and right that you had more exes.

[revolvings]

Why would I laugh. I thought Liz and I were meant to be since gradeschool. You know that. Alright. As long as you keep reminding me, I'll keep reminding you and we will be together and nothing will come between us. Yes, I'm your future. Don't you doubt it.

A few people fell in love, like 2. Different people from the ones I dated. Maybe now you can be my number 3.

I love you Michael Guerin. In case I haven't told you a few times. It's always good to see it in writing.

[cosmiccowboy]

You have a deal.

Ooh. Number 3. I’ve never been someone’s number 3 before. I feel special.

I love you too, Max. I hope you know that.

[revolvings]

You're my number one, babe. Always.

I'm starting to believe it. I may have to pinch myself a few more times, and you may have to say it a few more times.

[cosmiccowboy]

Haha. Better be.

I’ll say it as many times as you need to hear it. I haven’t always been great at telling you or showing you for that matter. I’ll do better.

[revolvings]

We can both do better from here on out. I think we have plenty reason to now.